1995.. i was in my 4th class.. Almost half of the year passed and we were all excited about the hot news.. school picnic!! everyone were asked Rs.50 and i was the first one to give my name. Picnics and tours always excite me. I went to my father and asked, “dad please, let me go.. i will go in morning and be back by evening”. He was like.. oh my god, no no, a picnic, am scared to send you baby.. It took me almost a week to convince him to let me go. The previous day of my big picnic.. me, brother and dad visited the one and only general stores we had at that time.. “pack ‘n’ pick” and bought almost all varieties of chocolates available. Am such a chocolate lover. Finally, the day came. I still remember, it was a great day.. we were taken to the neighbouring city Vijayawada, which i had already visited a thousand times by then. But still a school picnic was very exciting. I was looking out of the window and explaining to the boy sitting beside me. “in science, we studied.. a dense collection of trees is a forest. So, we are in a forest”. Actually we were in a park. i was such a *%$&.
Year passed, 1996. I was in 6th class. I haven’t studied my 5th class. This time we were taken to the near by beach. We had a good time playing in the beach and collecting some shells and live creatures which we tried hard to carry to home. That was fun. Even for this picnic, i had to put a great effort to convince my dad to let me go. Wow i had such a crazily loving father! i was so proud on the other hand.
1997, This time the picnic turned to be a excretion. A 3 day tour to Hyderabad. It was an absolute NO from dad when i asked him about going on school excretion. His reasons to deny my little request is.. 1) i might fall ill 2) its hot there in Hyderabad 3) the food and accommodation might not be so good. I was very sad and i some how convinced him saying everything will be fine. His come backs for this is.. lets take car and go, i will take you along ur friends. Where they go. U stay with me and thats the only way i would be sure that my baby is fine and good. I was so irritated with this proposal and didn’t talk to him for a day, for which by the end, dad accepted me to go. All my luggage was packed. It was the first time going somewhere for 3 days without mom and dad. Having a suitcase just for myself and a key for it. I already got a feeling that i was so grown up to go somewhere without parents and handeling everything on my own.
Every morning and night dad used to call me and make sure if everything was ok. It was just a 3 day trip. I had so much fun and i was so proud that my father calls me day and night and ask if everything was ok or no.. which not all others parents didn’t do. No matter it was because their parents were confident that their kids would be managing well or something else. I was just happy because of it. Dad loves me and i love him. After comming back to home, it was hard to explain how much i missed him. Especially my pillow and my bed [my father's tummy and his legs.. haha.. yes, i used to climb upon him and sleep]. I was always his baby, the same little baby which he holded in his hands on 24th sept, 1987.
After that i never had gone anywhere which would keep me away from my dad for more than a day. I had almost everything i wanted. He used to provide me everything even before it comes across my mind. I wonder how many fathers cares about their baby girl this much.
It was 2002 December and it was time for me to plan my graduation. Everyone in college were excited about EAMCET and i asked dad if i can apply too. His answer was a big NO. His plans for my graduation were like, i should join in the worst possible college and study in the last 3 months of exams so that i could spend the rest of the time with him. Wow.. what kind of a dirty plan is it. I actually loved it. I was very cool about my results and future plans while everyone were struggling about the exams and EAMCET.
But life is never the way you expect. Especially when you are hoping some fun moments and real good to be happening. I was hoping a very good time was going to start but the opposite had happened. I lost you dad. The reality took a big deal out of me. I was shooked and i should say, i still can’t believe that you aren’t with me anymore. Everyday I think about you, even today i was saying to myself, “oh, i thought about you today as well dad, its been 6 years 5 days that i have not seen you, feel your loving hug and touch, i miss you dad”. But the fact is, i still see him every day in myself.
I love you dad, and i always will.
Sometimes some emotions take us over and we have to find a way to let them out. Thanks wordpress for showing me a way to do it.
P.S : This post doesn’t mean that am not happy for what iam this day. I have a great mom who still makes sure i have evrything i need, the same way dad used to do. I feel so blessed to have such great parents.
